The Odyssey The Never Was

In May, I was supposed to go out and work on the new Christopher Nolan movie The Odyssey.

I had been so stoked, and I wanted to do it right this time.

I had full intentions of taking a tiny little Field Notes book and jotting down every nugget of wisdom that came out of Nolan’s mouth.

And trust me, there’s a lot.

A few years ago I was fortunate enough to work out in the desert on his movie Tenet for a month, and while I definitely have a

couple great stories, having a journal going would’ve been a goldmine now.

But a few days ago I’m sitting at my desk, and my phone dings.

"Hey Caleb, I come bearing bad news. Make up won't have enough time to cover your tattoos for this scene. We aren't going to be able to have you on. I'm so sorry dude."

Devastating.

But I shouldn’t be surprised.

After all… I jinxed myself.

And I asked for this.

Let me explain.

I Jinxed Myself

Work has been extremely slow for a lot of people since the film strike almost two years ago now.

And a while back, I had the hubris to think I was outside of that group.

In the thick of shooting the Marvel movie Thunderbolts, I remember having the thought that I was somehow immune to this slow

period.

That I had finally made enough of a name for myself that I’d never have to worry about not working again.

The wild thing is, I even remember thinking at the time, this is such an asshole attitude to have.

And even though it didn’t feel voluntary, like the thoughts were just materializing from somewhere else, I still felt guilty for having them.

I had gotten so comfortable with how things had been going, I just figured, this is how it is now.

Boy, was I wrong.

I Asked For This

Fast forward a few months later, I’m in full swing on another project up in Canada.

I’d decided I really wanted to start taking a bigger swing with this content stuff.

So I committed to one of those 30 day challenges. The kind where you post something new every single day.

Now that’s a hard enough task as it is.

Creating content from scratch for 30 days straight, especially when your main medium is video is a big ask.

Juggling 12-hour shoot days, Jiu-Jitsu, maintaining a long-distance relationship, and doing a 30-day challenge? Good luck.

But I turned off the perfectionist side of my brain, tackled each day as it came, kept hitting “post,” and by the end of the 30 days—I’d done it.

And this is where everything changed.

One of those posts blew up.

I discovered my format. (The one I mostly do now around cinematic tips and content.)

After over a year of posting for no one but my girlfriend and my mom… the needle was finally moving.

And at the end of that movie run, riding the high of that social momentum, I said it. Out loud.

"Honestly, I kinda just wanna sit at home for like six months and really focus on content. Really make a run at this thing."

And Here I Sit.

Six months… and counting.

I’ve had a few work days here and there since the start of the year, but this Nolan job was supposed to break the spell.

To get me back in the game (and replenish the savings account).

Life is funny.

This time last year, I was feeling invincible.

"I'm glad I'm in a position where I don't have to worry about work anymore." lol

And today?

Very much worried about the future. (And the present.)

I haven’t been this slow work-wise in six years.

And I’ve had more projects come up and fall through last minute than ever in my career.

But if there’s one thing I’ve learned over the last 15 years of chasing my dreams, it’s this:

Things have a way of working out.

They did when I filed for bankruptcy in 2015.

They did when I had to move to Atlanta during the pandemic because of my cancer diagnosis (Five years out today thank God)

And they will now.

The web we weave through these challenges always ends up holding meaning, connecting dots that unveil a future that couldn’t have happened without these “negative” experiences.

The shorter version of all this is : Trust the Process

And honestly, this process has pushed me to fast-track things that weren’t even on my immediate radar.

Things like Short Form Filmmaker and The Story Engine Starter

Things like finally reworking my office to reduce friction and make space for actual creating.

And I’ve spent enough time being broke and unsuccessful to know, I’ll survive if it comes to that.

The Odyssey didn’t happen. But mine continues.

Maybe this is the part of the story where I find a different kind of adventure.

So for now, I’ll just keep showing up. Creating.

Trusting that all of this is leading somewhere worth going.

I hope this helps.

Caleb